Sometimes if you’re lucky you will come across a person in your life who you can be yourself with…the type of person who is so easy and comfortable to spend time with…someone who genuinely cares about you because of who you are and who loves you for being you and not because of what you can do for them. I’ve been lucky enough to have a few of those types of people in my life, but now I have to say goodbye to one of them.
I received word that Barb passed away unexpectedly the morning of Saturday, July 31. Barb was my childhood next door neighbor; she lived in the house next to my parents on Cedar St. for nearly 30 years. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t know her or her daughter Chris (my sister in my heart and my oldest friend).
Those who know me know that my childhood was a tumultuous ride, and Barb’s house was an escape from that. As much as she may not have cared for what was going on in my home, nor the people doing it, she never treated me any differently because of it. Quite the opposite really – she was always good to me in a hundred little ways I can’t even begin to describe. She was kind and non-judgmental and I’ll always appreciate her for that.
She was there for me before I was taken away from my home, when I came home for those few short months, and later when I was an adult and out on my own. She was one of the first people in my life who Matt met when we started dating. She gave us our beloved cat Fred. Over the years she listened, consoled, and made me feel normal. She was the closest thing to family – a second mom really – and I will always treasure our time together.
I always tried to make it a point to stop and see her and Sonny when I came home (after we’d left for Washington). We’d sit and talk about the past as well as the present. I could never stay as long as I wanted to (my trips home are always a blur and there are never enough hours in the day) but I needed to see her and always enjoyed our visits.
In Sept. of 2008 Matt and I spent Labor Day afternoon with her and her family. It was a special time and we sat outside for a while and just chatted away. Before I left she took me aside and whispered something to me which I will carry in my heart always. She just knew…
The last time I saw her was over Christmas of 2009. It was a short visit sandwiched between another visit and a dinner. I didn’t know it would be the last time I would see her or I would have hugged her harder or told her again how much I loved her. I believe she knew though.
She was my touchstone and someone who I will miss dearly, and I am a better person for knowing her. I hate that she’s gone but she will always live on in my heart.
