I received word that Barb passed away unexpectedly the morning of Saturday, July 31. Barb was my childhood next door neighbor; she lived in the house next to my parents on Cedar St. for nearly 30 years. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t know her or her daughter Chris (my sister in my heart and my oldest friend).

Those who know me know that my childhood was a tumultuous ride, and Barb’s house was an escape from that. As much as she may not have cared for what was going on in my home, nor the people doing it, she never treated me any differently because of it. Quite the opposite really – she was always good to me in a hundred little ways I can’t even begin to describe. She was kind and non-judgmental and I’ll always appreciate her for that.

She was there for me before I was taken away from my home, when I came home for those few short months, and later when I was an adult and out on my own. She was one of the first people in my life who Matt met when we started dating. She gave us our beloved cat Fred. Over the years she listened, consoled, and made me feel normal. She was the closest thing to family – a second mom really – and I will always treasure our time together.

I always tried to make it a point to stop and see her and Sonny when I came home (after we’d left for Washington). We’d sit and talk about the past as well as the present. I could never stay as long as I wanted to (my trips home are always a blur and there are never enough hours in the day) but I needed to see her and always enjoyed our visits.

In Sept. of 2008 Matt and I spent Labor Day afternoon with her and her family. It was a special time and we sat outside for a while and just chatted away. Before I left she took me aside and whispered something to me which I will carry in my heart always. She just knew…

The last time I saw her was over Christmas of 2009. It was a short visit sandwiched between another visit and a dinner. I didn’t know it would be the last time I would see her or I would have hugged her harder or told her again how much I loved her. I believe she knew though.

She was my touchstone and someone who I will miss dearly, and I am a better person for knowing her. I hate that she’s gone but she will always live on in my heart.

path to Pacific Ocean – Polaroid 220 Land Camera

]]> http://www.yelley.com/blog/?feed=rss2&p=1425 0 http://www.yelley.com/blog/?p=1420 http://www.yelley.com/blog/?p=1420#comments Thu, 27 May 2010 22:03:23 +0000 Kelley http://www.yelley.com/blog/?p=1420 Time to move on…time to stop worrying and wondering.

No more grieving and mourning. I don’t think I have any tears left anyhow.

I’m stronger for this experience…and in ways I never expected. I didn’t crumble and I didn’t die (even when I thought I couldn’t take one more thing).

I love you, Matty. I can’t imagine anyone else I would have wanted to take this journey with.

I’m thankful for the wonderfully supportive people I have in my life, and am glad to know who they are.

Time to go drink a few of these and then see where tomorrow takes us…

Desk 1: 1999 – early 2001

Notable items: Dell GX1 series desktops running Windows NT SP6 (no USB) and Novell 4.?. I think the desktop laying on its side is a Compaq (pre-HP merge with a front loading/no tray cd slot). Everything including peripherals is beige. I can’t remember if the mice had scroll wheels or not but I’m leaning toward no. Loved my Dell rebranded Sony Trinitron flat screen CRT – sharpest picture ever!

Desk 2 – early 2001 thru mid 2002

Notable items: Beige CRT monitors and computer cases, but perihperals  (PS2) are black. The skinnier cases are Dell Dimensions, the rounded case under my desk was an NEC PC I was testing (it was horrible). We were running Win2K by then, CD-R’s were plentiful, and we were rolling out Palm 3′s, 3C’s (management usually, haha) and Palm 5′s a bit later. Best feature was my Herman Miller Aeron chair (pre 9/11 gov money ftw!)

Desk 3 – mid 2002 thru mid 2006

Notable items: I moved buildings four times during this job, and this is the desk I sat at the longest. Photo is circa 2004? Finally – flat panel monitors! Everything including monitors, cases, and peripherals are all black but are still PS2. We were most likely running Windows XP. Note my Handspring Treo 270 next to the keyboard – it was my first “smartphone” and I loved that thing to death (literally, I broke and replaced the door hinge twice). This was my smallest desk to date and was located in what could only be referred to as a carpeted garage (long story).

Desk 4 – mid 2006 – ??

Notable items: Dual 19 LCD’s. Desk still messy. Peripherals are all USB now. My iPhone is charging next to my keyboard. Through the course of these past 10 years there’s always been one item on every desk I’ve had : my Sun coffee mug which has been with me since the second day of my first “real” job is. Though you can’t see it in every photo it’s always there somewhere.

It’s been an interesting experience watching technology evolve over the years – to see monitors go from giant back-breaking CRT’s to lightweight LCD’s. PC cases are slimmer and sleeker now, and the chances of cutting one’s finger off on a sharp edge have diminished greatly. My first PDA was a Palm 3, and now I’m rolling with an iPhone. Ten years doesn’t seem so long ago but in technology time it feels like a lifetime ago.

]]> http://www.yelley.com/blog/?feed=rss2&p=1361 1 http://www.yelley.com/blog/?p=1337 http://www.yelley.com/blog/?p=1337#comments Sat, 13 Mar 2010 08:20:27 +0000 Kelley http://www.yelley.com/blog/?p=1337